CxD #109
Portrait of a Good Boy; Mushrooms; Tennis Legend Explains Character; Vulnerability
All the items in this week’s issue arrived as suggestions from CxD readers. Future hints of wonder are way more than welcome, so please send them to CxD@characterbydesign.org.
Poem with an Embedded Line by Susan Cohen
by Barbara CrookerWhen the evening newscast leads to despair,
when my Facebook feed raises my blood pressure,
when I can’t listen to NPR anymore,
I turn to the sky, blooming like chicory,
its dearth of clouds, its vast blue endlessness.
The trees are turning copper, gold, bronze,
fired by the October sun, and the bees
are going for broke, drunk on fermenting
apples. I turn to my skillet, cast iron
you can count on, glug some olive oil,
sizzle some onions, adding garlic at the end
to prevent bitterness. My husband,
that sweet man, enters the room, asks
what’s for dinner, says it smells good.
He could live on garlic and onions
slowly turning to gold. The water
is boiling, so I throw in some peppers,
halved, cored, and seeded, let them bob
in the salty water until they’re soft.
To the soffrito, I add ground beef, chili
powder, cumin, dried oregano, tomato sauce,
mashed cannellinis; simmer for a while.
Then I stir in more white beans, stuff the hearts
of the peppers, drape them with cheese and tuck
the pan in the oven’s mouth. Let the terrible
politicians practice / their terrible politics.
At my kitchen table, all will be fed. I turn
the radio to a classical station, maybe Vivaldi.
All we have are these moments: the golden trees,
the industrious bees, the falling light. Darkness
will not overtake us.The Paradox of Vulnerability
I knew Courtney back in my Teach For America days, and am proud to see her continuing to do impactful and tender work. Her interviewee is the author of a book I gave to my father after his near-death experience with multiple heart arrests and organ failures. When two generous spirits encounter each other, it’s inspiring to see and feel what transpires between them––When Courtney asks Frank “How are you?” his reply “I don’t know” is just the start of a beautifully honest and gentle and deeply wise conversation.
“A foundational voice in end of life care, Frank Ostaseski, author of The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully, shares how his series of recent strokes and the sudden switch in roles from caregiver to care-receiver have deepened his understanding of the surprising ways vulnerability can unlock personal resilience and cultivate compassion for oneself and others. In his conversation with Courtney E. Martin, the Zen Hospice Project co-founder speaks about the loss of identity in the setting of illness and why he’s more interested in discovery, not recovery.”
Dad is back in the hospital because of a blood infection from one of his IV tubes. As though she had already watched the above video about vulnerability, Mom wrote this when I asked her how they were doing:
“O, Kinius we try our best not to get sad and depressed , it’s very difficult coming back to to the place we hate so much and see Michalek attached again to those wires and hanging medication over his head, and his beautiful and already recovered hands from the last stay got poked by the needles again make me scream.
I see his face how he try to smile when he looks at me. We thought the new chapter written into our life lately has been coming back slowly in new , positive form. He was doing such a good job in rehab center, was so proud of himself. I love watching him getting more energy, walking outside, driving, he is trying so hard for me and for himself to get better.
I know we are going to get back to the place we have left a few days ago.
I just don’t want him to suffer anymore that’s all.”
Humans have a funny way of thinking everything revolves around them and their big brains. Meanwhile, mushrooms are kicking ass and taking names––and healing all kinds of pain. This film is full of wonders both visually and in the ways it helps us open to the interconnectivity of all of life.
